Relationships can be wonderful, but still have disagreements. One of the most common disagreements between partners is about managing joint finances. It often causes much tension and can happen early on or at any point in your relationship. You may have different priorities, such as saving for retirement, planning a home renovation, or saving money for children's college funds. Or, maybe one of you wants to invest, and the other wants just to keep your money in savings.

When it seems like you just can't come to an agreement, the “What If Monster” can become a problem. You might think, "What if our different opinions ruin our plans or relationship?" Let's look at that "what if" question and turn it into a positive conversation.

Acknowledge That Different Opinions Are Normal

It is not unusual for two people to have different opinions about what to do with money. Our upbringing, life experiences, fears, and ultimate financial goals typically shape our views. Instead of viewing your partner's views as "wrong," try to understand where they are coming from. It can allow you to start an open and honest conversation about your joint finances. Your values don't have to align perfectly. Finding a mutual understanding and a shared strategy that aligns with your values is essential.

Create Space for a Conversation About Money

It's essential to discuss what you want to do with your money. However, you want to have it at the correct time. When one of you is stressed or distracted, or you have just had an unexpected expense, it is not the time. Find a time that you are willing to hear each other out and devise a plan.

Here are some good questions to ask:

• What are the goals you feel strongly about?
• Are you worried about something financial in particular?
• What does financial security look like to you?

Opening up and answering these questions can help you understand each other's motivations, making compromise much easier.

Create a Team-Based Approach to Joint Finances

Once you know what you want to do with your money, it's time to make a unified plan that incorporates both goals. It can be beneficial to bring in a financial advisor like CrossleyShear Wealth Management to help.

They are a third party who can help couples do the following:

• Balance long-term needs with short-term wants.
• Identify your shared goals and core values.
• Establish clear expectations and roles around money management.
• Develop a customized plan that incorporates each person's priorities.

Schedule Regular Check-Ins

Once you have a financial plan that you both are comfortable with, it's important to plan regular check-ins about the plan. The plan you create now will work for now, but it might not work later. As you grow, your goals, lifestyle, and income will change. Scheduling regular check-ins with your plan is also vital in determining if any changes are necessary. Annually or anytime there is a significant life change, it is a good place to start.

The “What If Monster” Calms Down When You're on the Same Page

Just because you have disagreements about where your money should go doesn't mean your relationship is doomed to fail. It is human nature not to agree on everything. The key is communicating openly, planning intentionally, and leaning on a trusted advisor to help you make a plan you can stick to.

At CrossleyShear, we can help partners navigate conversations around their joint finances and turn tension into teamwork. If you're ready to make a plan, we are here to help. Contact us today to get started.

Every investor's situation is unique and you should consider your investment goals, risk tolerance and time horizon before making any investment. Prior to making an investment decision, please consult with your financial advisor about your individual situation. The foregoing information has been obtained from sources considered to be reliable, but we do not guarantee that it is accurate or complete, it is not a statement of all available data necessary for making an investment decision, and it does not constitute a recommendation. Any opinions are those of Dale Crossley and Evan Shear and not necessarily those of Raymond James.